well i'm kinda tired of people looking & thinking of me as the bad guy.

but what "he" said was right. it's either let her do as she pleases & keep breaking hearts or you do something about it. worst "he" can think of was excommunication. teach her a lesson. you can't keep treating people like that .... she has to understand that she will loose friends that way.

so he did. he stopped talking to her- deleted her off twitter and facebook. she went crazy. couldnt understand why and tried to be friends. he could care less. he was gonna keep it that way until he gets over her 'fakeness' and hopefully she'll change. but before any of that could happen, a friend of his & her had to interfere and basically make him give her another chance right away. that's where i think ruined everything. he's the type of person that needs a lot of time to get over things. interfering ruined it. bad move.

so he gave her another chance, and things were actually going well. until she "struck" within our inner circle. all the request for invites to go to places got very ... annoying. suspicion of the two dating looked very probable. but i thought to myself "so what if they like each other? theyre both single..." it's just that we were hoping the guy would have more common sense... seing as how he witness the heart break sorta.

well "he" got tired of hearing everything... didn't want to see her anymore. no speaking. nothing. another excommunication. we hear too many rumors to actually see that she probably has changed.

so now... i'm over it. i'm done with the bickering and bitterness. so tired of it all. i'm just waiting for "him" to get over it all.

i remember hearing the message by p.t. holding grudges. how it will ruin you. hate will destroy you. it's true. i'm not the person i use to be anymore. i was so forgiving and friendly.... but i've been so bitter lately. *sigh* i want to go back to the friendly days.

but atm im kinda mad cuz her recent blog said "Its amazing how you can be best friends with someone for a long time… and see them change. and then tell them. and have them completely ignore you." i'm hoping that's not me.. but i have a feeling that is. because first of all we weren't even best friends for a long time. ONE semester of college. of course i changed... i'm older and i have tons more responsibilities than before. uhhh... if she's talking about me.. she never told me anything about me changing. & completely ignore her. she stopped talking to me a long time ago. say like around the time i introduced her to my virt. girl. yeah... communication dropped between her and i. sucked. i felt like was used and 2nd option now. & the only reason i completely ignore her now is cuz i'm forced to. i would rather have a good stable relationship with my boyfriend and loose a friend than to keep the friend that will cause my boyfriend and i to fight.

i wanna tell him tho. how ridiculous this all is. he wont think so now... but later he will. he hates her. doesnt like how she treats people and thinks she's super close to people.... but whatever. it's in the past darling. let's let it go. and start fresh. just try not to get too involved with that individual.

"can you not?!"

yeah, can you stop making me feel so insignificant to you.

i feel as if i am no longer the "significant" other.

more like.. oh yeah guys, this is my good friend- jenny.

the fact that you hardly call anymore still bothers me, jerk.

i thought after we talked everything out.... you would at least do a little bit more.

i guess it's true- guys never change. not for the better anyways.

i had you when you were the most amazing boyfriend ever.

i don't know what happened to you... supposedly you say

"i don't let anyone boss me around anymore. i'm not gonna be a pushover anymore. i do my own thing"

well that's nice. that works for guys that don't have girlfriends.. and fly solo.

quit being so inconsiderate & selfish.

we're suppose to be in this together.... i think about how you would feel before i do something.

why can't it be the same vice versa? you don't think, jerk. you just do as you please.

i know we promised each other that we would never break up with each other.

but i'm telling you now. i hate how you make me feel sometimes. i hate that you actually don't care when you hurt my feelings... and how i can't come to you to talk anymore. i can't cry to you cuz you honestly don't care. you probably think "what the eff. get over it". yup.

this will be one promise i'll have to break...... i can't marry someone who treats me like this. i know you don't give a crap about my issues. at least look and sound like you care you moron.

i'm starting to let go .... let you do more and more as you please. cuz honestly i'm tired of me nagging to. it's not like you listen to me anyways.

& who knows.. maybe you'll meet another girl and perhaps she will be better than me... maybe then you will realize why i didn't want to let you do EVERYTHING you want.

i hope you're happy. cuz i'm not.

i wish i can take it back to the days when you cared so much more.

Greetings

I only made this blogger because my boyfriend found out about my tumblr. & that's where I go to vent my frustration & I didn't want him reading it. So here I am.